I fucking hate you.

time check: 12.44pm

sigh. sometimes i hate my mum. a few hours ago, she asked me to fetch my sister from school. i said okay, since she left $10 for me. i forgot the way there so i called her. she shouted at me like im a nobody to her. she kept saying im fucking useless, cant even fetch my sister from school. i said i just forgot the way what. then she gave me confusing directions and got me even moree confused.

convo between me and my mum:

mum: 'next time you fetch your sister from school everyday, not go out as if you got no meaning in life.'

me: 'eh, mum. i go out not to enjoy okayy. i was out jobhunting. everytime im out its either im jobhunting or at least, trying to look for a job cause i know how hard its is for you as a single mum.'

mum: ' yalah. go look for a job or go out with boyfriend? then when you look for a job, you wear shorts??'

me: ' i dont have time for a boyfriend, mum. what i wear, it doesnt matter. its just looking for a job, not going for an interview. if im going for an interview, i'll obviously wear something nice. Nevermind uh you just go fetch her im not in the mood alr.'

then i just hung up the phone. seriously. at least im trying my fucking best to get a job and all she does is degrade me and losing hope in me. well she might lose hope but i feel like giving up just to please her, my own mother.

well from now, i dont wanna live to please anyone. not even my mum.
i dont live to impress people. cliche? I dont think so.
i just wanna be happy, leading a normal life. is that so hard to ask for?

she can hate me all she want and i dont wanna fucking care anymore. she sees me as a no lifer who bums around at home. well i dont bum around at home. im out everyday to look for work but this bloody singapore is giving me shitty shit. im on the verge of giving up looking for a job.

or maybe its just cause of singapore la. even my friends who have a diploma in business finances have been looking for a job for nearly a year and they still cant land themselves a decent job.

oh well fuck you singapore and mr president _|_